The struggles of a young mum.

Being a mum is both rewarding and exhausting at the same time. Many parents tell you both these things, and many people have their opinions which can be nice if you ask for them and intimidating when you don’t.

Im writing today because I need to stress the things that people never told me before having my baby.

The first thing is the emotions!! Everyone has them.. Everyone has their own way of expressing and coping with them but not everybody understands them. Being pregnant released emotions I have never felt before both good and bad. But the extremities of these emotions is what had me gobsmacked. I new being pregnant I’d be hormonal, but I thought it would all go away once my beatiful little boy arrived… I was wrong so very wrong. I don’t know if it is a motherly instinct but I feel so protective all of the time, this can be good but also so draining. He is only a baby and my brain is already thinking of the worst, bullies, getting his heart broken, not being happy and oh the list just goes on. Hopefully my body is just trying to figure out what I’ll do when the time comes but I think it’s way to early to be having these worries.

Another thing that no body told me is the strangers, who all of a sudden feel as if they need to tell me their better parenting techniques. I understand some are trying to help but I always jump on the defensive, I feel as if they are putting my ways down. I think it’s he way they say it not what they say. I have gotten so many negative comments about the fact that I don’t breast feed anymore. I honestly didn’t think into it as much as these strangers have. I’m told that I am depriving my son of the good he needs and I’m not going to form a good connection to my son since I have stopped breast feeding so early. I stopped because I work, because it’s very draining, because I wanted a full nights sleep with my partner helping with the feeding, because my boobs felt like saggy tea bags, because I was constantly leaking milk at inappropriate times, because I wanted a drink!! And no I don’t feel like a bad mother for stopping in fact I feel like a better mother as I now have the energy to enjoy every moment with my son and partner. Mothers these days just can’t win, I got filthy looks when my baby was starving and I had to breast feed in public (even with a throw blanket over) and now I get rude comments for not? It’s so hard to please everyone and that’s why I now do what’s suits me and those who matter will accept that.

Oh and the looks… I don’t know if it’s because I am a young mother or the fact that I am covered in tattoos or maybe it’s my bright vibrant hair colours that change every week. But the looks from people that have no idea about me, or my life are so negative. I have had old people shake their heads, professional people look me up and down and even some ask me my age and shake their heads when I respond. (I am 21 mind you) Now I understand this is young to some, but I am a great mother and I’m not having anybody tell me otherwise.

These people do not see what I do at home, or for a job. I am a hard worker and I have given up my old work managing bars since having my son for a more suitable and professional job which I love, nursing! Everything I do is for my family and I do not appreciate people judging me after one quick look. It could be one of their family members that I care for while nursing and they wouldn’t even know.

Being a mum is amazing and no one is perfect but I know I am doing the absolute best I can and one day when my beatiful son is old enough he will see that and know everything I do is for him.

I have written this because I want every mother out their to know that we are not alone, and maybe not everyone understands the Lengths we go to in order to be the mothers we are, but we do and that’s all that matters.

#youngmum #mumlife #breastfeeding

#baby #struggles #emotions #opinions

#bethebestyoucan

First blog

Well just as I imagined.. The second I sit down to write my little boy wants my attention, so I’m going to make this one nice and quick. 

I think this blogging thing will be good for me, I like expressing myself through writing.. I just usually do it on a peice of paper and it gets thrown out or covered in my weird doodles. It will be a nice change to have other people read what I write. 

My little man is one month old next week and it feels like it has flown by!! 

I have to go and attend to my hungry little munchkin but I can’t wait to share my adventures with whoever wants to join. 

Letting my guard down.

I like to act tough, put on a brave face, tell everyone I’m coping just fine. I hate accepting help. I’d rather struggle it out and know that I have put in 100% effort before asking for help and feeling as though I have failed. And as much as I like to think my brave face works (and it does with pretty much everyone), my partner knows better.

At first I didn’t know if I loved or hated the fact that he could see straight through me.

As much as I like to think I’m independent and dislike accepting help.. I need his help, I honestly couldn’t do it without him.

He knows things. He knows I don’t like accepting help and because of this he brushes the big things off as nothing. I slept one night and to someone with no children that sounds normal right? Yea well not for people with newborns.. I was having a rough night and well.. I slept. I didn’t hear baby crying in the other room, but instead of waking me up my partner covered the night shift with baby. Mind you he started work at 6am the next day. He didn’t make me feel bad. He didn’t tell me all the things he had to do last night, all the nappies he had to change, how tired he was. He just did it and went to work the next day.

It may not sound like much to others but it’s the things like this that amaze me. He is my best friend and I always want him around I love him more than I can explain. I’m with him because we both connect on a different level, a level that I really don’t know how to put in words, we know the best and the worst of each other and we both love every bit of it.

I decided that I loved the fact that he could see straight through me. It means when I’m struggling and the last thing I want to do is open up and talk, I don’t have to. I have peace of mind knowing that he knows when I need help and holy moly is he good at helping.

He still amazes me every single day. And I can’t wait to continue to be amazed everyday for the rest of our lives.